Many older children who enter the U.S. foster care system have sleep issues. Sleeping issues include trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, night terrors, and bedwetting to name a few. It shouldn’t be surprising that they have sleep issues considering the trauma they have experienced. Many children who have suffered sexual abuse were awakened in their beds from sleep to be raped by a trusted adult. Who knows how long sleep anxiety may last after that type of experience. For those who did not suffer that type of abuse you can still understand their unease.
They have moved away from their family, belongings, and pets. They are sleeping in a house full of strangers and in a different bed. The smells are different and the rules are different. Some children who enter foster care have never slept in a real bed before. Others have only slept with their parents or siblings before coming to their new home. Some of these children have made multiple moves. They may be afraid to sleep lest they must move again in the morning.
Bedwetting is another issue entirely. Many children struggle with bedwetting because their bladders are too small to hold urine all night. All three of my birth sons wet the bed until they were between six and eight years old. My two adopted sons did the same thing. There is some evidence that bedwetting my even be hereditary. Some parents get up in the middle of the night, wake their children, and take them to the bathroom. I like my sleep so I never did this. It wouldn’t be a good idea to try this method with a child who suffered sexual abuse.
We did try a few exercises that were supposed to help. One method was having your child wait an extra 15 minutes after having the urge to urinate before using the bathroom. Slowing increase the waiting time as the child masters each increment, to stretch the size of the bladder. The other exercise involved having the child stop and restart the flow of urine several times. The child was to do this several times a day while urinating to strengthen the muscles. I think that eventually they all just grew out of it.
In the meantime, we purchased vinyl mattress covers for every child mattress in the house. That way, just the sheet got wet and the mattresses weren’t ruined. We kept the vinyl covers for every foster child who lived in our home. That made bedwetting a non-issue. We just had to wash a single sheet. However, some parents make it into a big issue. That may cause a rebellious or RAD child to wet the bed on purpose, for negative attention. I know many families who struggle with this issue as well as encopresis.
Photo Credit: 2007 Julia Fuller.